[Tori dictated today's blog]: So, The Big Red Dope propped the front door open this afternoon when she got home from somewhere. We let her leave the house once a day - if we don't, she gets a little cranky. So instead of the yard, I decided to use the place that smells AWESOME where all the other dogs pee, and left the apartment. I'm 15 years old - I don't need to sign any log book when I leave the house! I took my time sniffing around the stairs and shrubs in the big square with walls.
When I got back to the front door, it was closed! I could hear talking inside, so I barked. And then I scratched. Nothing. I waited 5 minutes. I scratched again. I heard the Dope open the sliding glass door to the yard - where I was not - and I heard her slide the door shut. I barked again. She is not very bright, and doesn't speak Dog, but you don't need to be a genius to understand 'HEY' in any language, do you? I waited 5 more minutes, and I barked again.
And finally the Big Red Dope opened the front door, and said, like it was a big shocker, "Oh my god, you're outside! What are you doing out here?" She was still on the phone, and I didn't want to embarrass her, so I wasn't gonna say anything, but then she says to me, "You can't just wander outside without telling anyone! I didn't know where you were!"
Well, I knew where I was, sister! I was standing outside the front door!